This week #BlogBattle Week 8 Theme: Madness
Next Week’s Theme: Bun 😉 Click here to find out how to join in!
Mad Mona, Her Majesty of Madonia
No one likes a complainer. Not even me. But today I feel like complaining. I can’t take much more of this! Her Majesty is off her rocker, and somehow I got stuck keeping her out of trouble. What a joke!
“Your Highness, I don’t think this is the best plan.” I hear the whine in my voice, but after six hours of corralling a queen, I think it’s allowable.
“Nonsense, Doyle. This is the best plan I’ve had all day. Now do hold my skirt back right there.” Her matter-of-fact tone hides the madness within. “No, no, you nincompoop. Hold it up and back. I cannot see my feet upon this skinny board. You can run, can’t you, Doyle?”
Her helmet looks askew, but she doesn’t seem to care. I care. If she dies of a brain injury, I’ll be the one they blame. Mine is on as tight as possible. I think I might have cut off all circulation to my brain. Maybe I’m going just as mad as Her Majesty.
“Doyle, wake up!” she cries in exasperated insanity.
“Sorry, Your Majesty. I’m not as fast as I used to be, but since my life depends on it as much as yours, I’ll be quick-footed.”
Her Cheshire Cat grin is more than I can bear. Maybe dying in the chase will be better for me than going insane. The queen’s cackle of a laugh is the only indication her madness runs deeper than a skateboard ride down the main garden’s sloping path.
“Give us a push, Doyle.”
“Highness, may I just suggest–“
“No, Doyle, you may not suggest. Now, push,” she says, emphasizing the last word with a squinty glare.
My sigh can be heard a mile away, but there’s nothing for it. I’m bound to obey. If not, my head will roll down this hill all by itself. I’m resigned to the inevitable fate of death later, but not right now, so I give her a push and chase the mad majesty down the hill. I almost keep up with her, but I lag behind.
She’s definitely gone crazy, but watching her pull away from me because I can’t keep up, I’m too old, I’m actually impressed by her stability on that rickety thing called a skateboard. Who knew?
My lungs are done and my hands like resting on my knees better than flapping in the breeze, so I stop and watch Mad Mona, Her Majesty of Madonia, glide down the walk as though she’d done this a thousand times before.
“Your Highness,” I call out too late.
SPLASH!
Oh dear, I think, now I’ve done it. We didn’t think of brakes, but at least the fountain was there to stop her. I’m actually trying to cover a laugh now. Nothing is funnier than a mad monarch with her skirts about her ears, sopping wet in a pond, complete with a lily pad hat to finish the look.
At least it seems we’ll both live to see another crazy day!
Click here for more from Mad Mona in Mad Mona’s Monkey Business
2015 Copyright Rachael Ritchey, All Rights Reserved
Rachael Ritchey 
On topic: Still love this story, would love to see more of them!
Off topic: I nominated you for the Liebster Award! If you choose to accept, see here: http://hehasplans.com/blog/liebster-award/
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’d be inclined to enjoy more of Mad Mona & Doyle, too. 🙂 THANK YOU for the nomination! So sweet. 😀 THANKs!
LikeLiked by 1 person
🙂 this was one of those stories that you just have to read on an easy, beautiful day. It draws you in, keeps your attention, but it doesn’t way you down. The treat of it is that you come away with a smile. Loved it!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ah! Then goal accomplished! Lighthearted and amusing. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
if more people complained like this, they would probably find the rest of us a lot more receptive 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
Haha you may be right. Doyle is one heckofaguy! I’m sure that’s why he got sick minding the mad monarch. 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
it’s probably why he got the job in the first place.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Good point. We need more Doyles. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Hehe! Mad Mona of Madonia – wonderful. This week’s theme is bringing out some wonderful tales, and yours is no exception. The image of the poor queen with her skirts about her ears made me laugh. 😀
LikeLiked by 1 person
haha The best part is I don’t think she was even that upset about it. 🙂 Thank you!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Great story IBFF! Loved it
LikeLiked by 1 person
I think I should have described her hair more…wiry and gray, protruding from her helmet like a halo of fluff. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
You did well, a potential winner me thinks 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
awww, thanks. If nothing else, I fell in love with my crazy queen and….Doyle. hehehe
LikeLiked by 1 person
We all love a crazy queen!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Do you wish you had a real live crazy one?
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes don’t we all?
LikeLiked by 1 person
Um, yeah, although, if things keep going the way they do over here, we’ll have a crazy, lying woman for president. ooooo…did I say that out loud? *looks around for suspicious characters who may or may not want to silence me*
LikeLiked by 1 person
Mad Mona of Madonia = best name ever! 😀 Love it! Her and Doyle make a fun and funny team. A monarch on a skateboard, lol, I had fun picturing that. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Picture a sweet, loony, grandma monarch on a skateboard and it’s that much better! 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Lol XD Fantastic! I want to be that when I’m old! 😀
LikeLiked by 1 person
yeah, me, too. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
This is a charming and light-hearted read. The reel in my head had this as an adult cartoon. I see the characters so clearly. Engaging and innovative. ❤ ❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
haha, that’s fantastic Tess. In my mind they were a couple of people a tad bit past mid-life. 🙂
LikeLike
But so colorful. ❤ ❤ ❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
I love this! I love the poetic roll of your words! She might be mad but she sounds like the good, fun, kind of mad! Poor Doyle~ :3 He seems lovable tho!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Haha, that is exactly my thought. Doyle is rather endearing in my head. 🙂 He’s almost as old as the queen and both are not so young. ha! 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person