“When O.W.L. Goes Wrong” for April’s #BlogBattle

“When O.W.L. Goes Wrong”

A Mad Mona, Monarch of Madonia Short Story

by Rachael Ritchey

I could feel my muscles cramping up in the cringe pinching my face. “Doyle, do this. Doyle, do that,” ran through my brain while my monarch prodded me with the flat of her hand.

“Majesty,” I said, not carrying how much it sounded liked a moan, “is this really necessary?”

Mad Mona (as I called her in my head and NEVER out loud) harumphed and pushed my shoulder again. “It’ll be worth it to see the looks on their faces.” The mincing queen of Madonia rubbed her palms together. “Now, stop diddy-daddling* and get this O.W.L. going!”

I stretched once more with my hands pressed into my lower back and supressed a groan before bending forward to screw in the last bolt.

“Very good, Doyle! You might make a proper mechanic yet!”

My monarch placed her foot on the end of the attached board and pressed it down. With the gravest of expressions, she placed both feet on its slanted surface and bent her knees in a fake jumping motion several times . . .

“For good measure,” she explained with a solid nod. “Very good. Very good. Now, where is Cook?”

Mad Mona glanced around until she found Cook Burgundy hiding his bulk behind me where the smell of waffles drifted from a folding table set up in front of the doors leading off the balcony.

“Majesty?” Hesitating, I glanced at the gathered nobles in the garden below the balcony. “Somehow I don’t think your guests will appreciate this . . . extravagance.”

“Nonsense, Doyle! Everyone enjoys waffles at a garden party!”

“But–“

“Cook,” she said, pressing my raised hand down and stepping around me, “are they ready?”

With a deep sigh, Cook Burgundy said, “Yes, Majesty, but–“

“Very good! Place them on that lower end there, near the table. And, Doyle, where is that chair?”

“Here, my–“

She swept the chair from my hands, nearly knocking me over in the process, but I endured. What choice did I have? If something happened to the monarch of Madonia, or heaven forbid she was displeased, my head would be the first on the chopping block. I rubbed my throat at the thought.

Cook placed the perfect stack of 20 extra-large waffles on the lowered end of the lever and stepped back through the doorway. I rolled my eyes at his timidity while he peeked around the frame in worried expectation. Coward.

“Help me up, help me up,” Mad Mona said, waving her arms at me.

With one last self-indulgent sigh, I handed my queen up on to her chair where she promptly waved to her guests.

“Yoohoo! Lovelies! I have a suprise. I have created the Official Waffle Lever for our party entertainment and to deliver my favorite snack!”

The people milling about below whispered behind their hands, many looking quizzical if not downright confused. I had a sudden urge to duck out of sight and hide any proof of my involvement in this preposterous activity.

“One,” Mona said, swinging her arms, “two . . . three!” She jumped off the chair, her feet meeting the raised arm of the lever.

A unified gasp arose from the party below.

I fought the urge to close my eyes and lost. With a thundering thump, a clatter of chair and lever, and the random splatter of waffles landing nearby, I finally dared open my eyes only to be greeted by the raucous laughter of Mad Mona . . . covered in waffles.

Half sitting, half sprawled across the lever, Mad Mona picked up a waffle off her head, examined it and with a shrug of her shoulders, took a bite.

“Well, that was a hoot!”


I hope you enjoyed Mad Mona and Doyle! Every once in a while I have to write something for Mona and Doyle because they are some of my daughter’s favorite characters I’ve written. She begs for new Mona stories any time anything reminds her of this mischievous monarch’s shenanigans!

Check out more #BlogBattle stories for the April prompt of OWL at BBPrompt.com


If you want more Mad Mona, here she is . . .

Mad Mona, Her Majesty of Madonia

Mad Mona’s Monkey Business

Mad Mona and the Special Robe

Mad Mona, Monarch of Madonia’s Christmas Surprise

* see converastion in comments with Cathleen Townsend for explanation of why I chose to use this “incorrect” version of dillydallying. ๐Ÿ™‚

23 responses to ““When O.W.L. Goes Wrong” for April’s #BlogBattle”

  1. This was fun to read! Part of the adventure was putting together the clues as the story advanced and then discovering my suspicions were correct. At the beginning I had some concern Doyle was going to wind up in big trouble, which seemed to make Mad Mona’s reaction at the end all the more enjoyable. And of course I loved that the last word was ‘hoot’!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Hahaha, I loved this, Rachael! Mad Mona sounds positively bonkers โ€” in the best way possible! Why be sane when you can live life exuberantly? Poor Doyle. Trying to keep his (and hers!) head in one piece. Wonderful comedy bubbled through this piece. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

    1. โค Thanks, Josh! I love Mona and Doyle, but I'm also intimidated every time I try to write a story for them. They are funny and fun and lighthearted, and I lack confidence in writing this way. ๐Ÿ™‚

      Like

  3. What a cute delivery! I love your clever development of story and its colorful characters.
    – Melanie A. Peters from http://www.intentergy.com

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Aww, thanks, Melanie! ๐Ÿ™‚ My daughter keeps asking for these to be illustrated and made into fun kids’ books. I might just do that. ๐Ÿ™‚

      Liked by 1 person

      1. That would be a terrific read!

        Liked by 1 person

  4. I love Mad Mona and the waffle party, and it’s great that Doyle only calls her Mad Mona in the privacy of his head. It fits, too, because it’s so madcap. Fun story!

    And I love that you have a character you invented for your kids. Mine was the mighty wizard Seymour.

    And in case it matters to you, it’s dilly-dallying or dillydallying (apparently the hyphen is optional): https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/dillydally.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Cathleen! I do so love Doyle and Mona. My daughter definitely makes me love them more. ๐Ÿ™‚ It’s great when our kids enjoy our characters!

      As far as diddy daddle, I know, I looked it up ahead of time because I knew it might be an issue, but when I was growing up I always heard it as “diddy daddling,” and it has become a sometimes/still-rare-used-evolved version of dillydallying (diddle daddling, and so on). I might better change it to “dawdling.” Dillydally, is an outdated word to begin with, but it’s still recognized. Still, this was Mad Mona’s dialogue, so I chose to go with the vernacular I heard growing up. ๐Ÿ™‚ Thanks for that, though! I’m sure this will be an interesting word conversation for anyone reading the comments! ๐Ÿ˜€

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I think all writers are at least somewhat word nerds. That’s fascinating–your childhood history with the variant. I’d never heard it used before. : )

        Liked by 1 person

        1. It’s funny, isn’t it? I think local dialects are interesting, and it might have just been a family thing. That’s why I looked it up, but I couldn’t resist using it for Mona. haha She’s a force unto herself!

          Liked by 1 person

  5. She was properly mad was Mad Mona!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes, mad and magnificent! haha ๐Ÿ˜€ Thanks, Si!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Always a pleasure Rach ๐Ÿ™‚

        Liked by 1 person

  6. Oh, and I forgot to say that it’s so cool to hear the daughter backstory.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yeah, it’s pretty fun. She’s my biggest story fan at home and is inspired to write her own fun stories. ๐Ÿ™‚

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I think that’s absolutely fantastic! Great family time idea that is fun and productive.

        Liked by 1 person

  7. And how did you come up with that on the spot? Hmmm?

    I was already thinking about it, but now it’s for certain – waffles for breakfast tomorrow.

    This story was a hoot! (Although, it had me worried about Doyle and everyone else, in the beginning.)

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Mad Mona is rather inspiring. She’s definitely a character meant for 6-8 year olds and the parents who read to them. haha Waffles are always a welcome meal, any time of day!

      haha, thank you. I worry for Doyle and innocent bystanders, but they always seem to pull through!

      Liked by 1 person

  8. Just delicious (ahem, get it?) This was a charming story! Now I am hungry for waffles and must have a snack. Thanks for this adorable story, Rachael!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks, Maura Beth!! ๐Ÿ˜€

      Like

  9. […] “When O.W.L. Goes Wrong” by Rachael Ritchey […]

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